Single Parent Teachers: Pros and Cons + Tips

Being a single parent is always going to come with challenges. But it’s a unique kind of challenge if you’re a single parent and a teacher. Not only are you responsible for your own child, but for a class full of kids too. Being a single parent and a teacher means that you spend a lot of time alone with kids all day, as well as in the evenings and weekends. It also means that unlike your married co-workers, you may do both jobs alone.

I worked full time as a teacher while being a single parent for a good chunk of my oldest daughter’s childhood. It is the hardest thing I ever did, and while I’m doing better now, it created some long-term mental health struggles for me. Humans are not meant to do everything alone. Carrying the teaching responsibilities alone (I was a French teacher which few other teachers could relate to), along with being a 100% solo parent to my daughter, it took its toll over time.

After a long week of work, I knew that I had a weekend with my daughter to look forward to – but alone. No breaks, sleeping in, or much support. I eventually ended up quitting teaching because I pushed myself too hard for too long, and I didn’t have enough in me to keep going.

But don’t worry – I’m here to help you avoid teacher burnout and thrive in your important roles as a parent and a teacher. Here are tips for smashing it as a single parent teacher!

14 Tips for Surviving as a Single Parent Teacher

1. Draw VERY firm boundaries with work

All teachers need to draw some boundaries with work, but single parents especially. You have two important jobs where minors depend on you. This can take a lot out of you, physically and mentally. And honestly? Your home life comes first. Your child has only you, whereas your students have many supports at school and home.

I can’t stress how important a work-life balance is. I recommend being specific about the boundaries you draw with work, so that you can be present in your after-school commitment. Have principles that you committ to, and don’t ever go against them.

Here are some examples of boundaries that either myslef, or coworkers that I knew lived by:

• No checking work email on weekends or evenings (highly recommend this one)
• No communicating with parents outside of certain ‘office hours’
• Not doing anything work-related after a certain hour, such as 5 pm
• Having at least 1 hour each evening to yourself (for me, this was after my little one was in bed, but those evenings really recharged me)

2. Reconsider extracurricular activities

There is a lot of pressure put on teachers to run extracurricular activities for students at school. Please don’t get pressured into them like I did. I had many well-meaning older teachers encourage me to take on voluntarily extra-curriculars outside of what I was already doing, because it would look good on a resume, get me in admin’s good books, and yada yada.

Well now I’m telling you, taking on all those extras did not help me in the long run. They contributed to my burnout because I was only doing them to impress someone, not because I wanted to. And don’t get me wrong – I would have enjoyed these extracurricular activities if I weren’t already so exhausted and starving for some alone time.

In hindsight, I would have been more valuable to students and to myself if I’d spent my breaks recharging rather than jumping through more hoops.

I’m not saying not to do extracurriculars at school if you really want to. But in the grand scheme of things, extracurriculars will still be there when your children are older. Your kids are only young once and really need you in their formative years! My little one is now a teenager and I regret that I spent so much of her young childhood stressed out.

3. Have two (2) backup babysitter options

It’s best to have one reliable person that you can count on, and a decent backup plan in case they get sick or can’t make it. I recommend having at least two people that are able to watch your child, in the event that you need to be at work (during the day if they’re sick, or after school if there’s an event.)

I only had one option – (my mom) who was very helpful and stepped in when she needed to. But she also had a full-time job, and I ran the risk of having no one if she couldn’t make it for some reason. This was just a reality of how it was for me, but it would have been a little easier if I had asked for help from more people.

Asking for help is a vulnerable experience and don’t be surprised if its harder than you thought. However, the gains are worth it. Most people love to help, and creating that village for you and your child is so worth it!

4. Monitor how you’re feeling, and LISTEN to your body

A popular coping mechanism for getting through this overstimulating world we’ve created is to disconnect from feelings and spend most of the day on autopilot. By not feeling. By not connecting with their body. This may work for a while, but suppressed emotions are really unhealthy for you. They aren’t great for your child either. If you read the book When the Body Says No: The Cost of Hidden Stress, you learn the toll of supressing emotions and ignoring how you really feel. So if you’re struggling with stress, then its time to do something – talk to a therapist, take a mental health day, hit the pause button or say no to some obligations.

Don’t feel guilty for doing this because you can’t be useful to your kids, or to your students if you start struggling with your own mental health. Teacher burnout impacts not only teachers and their families but also their students. If you’re worried that you might be burning out, then take our teacher burnout quiz to get a more clear idea, and possible next steps.

5. Stay organized

Being organized will make you feel calmer and the sense that things in life are going smoothly. I am not naturally an organized, type-A personality, so this part was tough for me, and it felt like extra work to put organizational systems in place. But in the end, its worth the upfront hassle.

Have a special folder for parent communication, anecdotal notes and assessments. Have two piles – work to mark, and work to be handed back. It can be tough to keep everything in its place, especially as the space we teachers are given can differ greatly.

6. Register your child(ren) in after-school daycare

There’s no way I could have survived teaching as a single parent if there wasn’t an after-school childcare option for my daughter. As teachers, we all know that our job doesn’t end at the dismissal bell – there’s often lots of things that still need be worked on after that. Having a regular after-school childcare option will be a necessity as a single-parent teacher.

7. Live close to your and your child’s school

I lived right around the corner from the school that I worked at as a single parent. While I wouldn’t necessarily recommend living that close, it helped a lot being close to the school. This may or may not be possible depending on your situation – but if you can manage it, it sure helps!

Living close to the school meant that we had more time in the mornings to get ready, and it didn’t matter if I forgot something because I could easily pop home. I was close enough to pop home during lunch breaks in case I needed to. I sometimes went home just to meditate and unwind for 30 minutes before picking my daughter up at the after-school daycare, and it was a good way to recharge before taking on the evening

8. Explain your situation to your admin

Hopefully you have a good understanding principal, who encourages staff to look after themselves and their families first. I’m not recommending that you go into detail about your personal life with your principal, without having established a rapport and relationship first. But knowing that you’re a parent, and a single parent at that, is helpful for them to know and understand.

Not all principals are great leaders, or are any good at empowering teachers. But, at the very least, if your principal knows the facts of the situation then they are more likely to understand when things come up.

9. Ask for help from coworkers and neighbours

The most important thing to get over as a single parent is the fear of asking for help. As someone who is both teaching and parenting, you should take every ounce of help you can get and don’t feel ashamed to ask.

You have two very demanding jobs – and you can’t expect to do it all by yourself. I regret not asking for more outreach when I was a single parent teacher. Life could have been much easier if I’d asked for – and accepted- helping hands.

Getting support from coworkers

It’s hard to find the time, but I highly recommend trying to make good connections with colleagues at your school. Teaching is much less challenging when you have coworkers with whom you can share resources, tips, or even watching your class while you make a quick phone call – ask them. (And be prepared to return the favour if they ever need your help.) Remember, this does’t only benefit you. Being able to count on fellow school staff keeps school staff morale high, and is good for everyone.

Getting support from friends/family/community:

I always had a hard time asking neighbours, family and friends for help as a single parent – but now that my daughter is older, I wish I had asked more often. Life can be so much easier when you have an extra hand (or two) to help here and there.

10. Have ready-to go lunches at work

Over the years of being a teacher, I developed a survival kit to keep at work which included necessities to make it easier to get through the day. One of the most important things to keep at school was non-perishable lunch items that I could use to nourish myself during the day, in the event that I didn’t have time to bring a lunch, such as protein bars, or shake (with a shaker bottle.)

11. Try to teach the same grade year after year

Teaching the same grade over again cuts down on your workload. I taught Core French for many years, and sometimes I wondered why I stayed in it that long. The truth is, as a single parent – I didn’t want huge learning curves or challenges at work if I didn’t need them. I also recommend that you not take them on if you don’t need to.

My goal at school was to do my job effectively (which is easier to do wen you know the material) and have the time and energy left over for the most important things – me and my daughter. Teachers don’t have full control over what they teach year after year, but I recommend doing what you can to stay in the same grade or subject for as long as possible – especially when your kids are young.

12. Take a mental health day if you need one

In my case, I was a sole support parent (my daughter was with me full-time.) It took a mental health day every now and then, so I could rest, recharge. Sometimes, those ‘mental health’ days were the only time I got any time to myself, for weeks or even months. They were the only break I got, and they truly saved my sanity.

As a single parent and a teacher, you have two jobs were young people count on you and need you to be functioning at your best. In order to do that, you need to look after yourself first.

13. Build a regular meditation and exercise into your day

As a single parent, it’s hard to get out of the house in the evenings – this is why I recommend doing either home workouts or meditation at home. There’s no doubt that doing meditation and workouts can improve your physical and mental health, making it easier to navigate your responsibilities.

Try to do at least 20 minutes of medidation per day. I know that sounds impossible to fit in, but its worth it. That ‘off’ time will make you more productive during your ‘on’ time. Insight Timer is a great app for meditation; there is also Calm and Headspace. All three of them have free as well as paid versions. I found the free versions very helpful, and never paid.

14. (Bonus) Don’t lose sight of your hobbies!

It’s good to have a break from thinking about your teaching and parenting responsibilities. Studies even show that having those brain breaks makes you more effective at your jobs.

If you already have a hobby or something you’re passionate in – great. Make sure you are building that into your schedule, because its an important part of making you feel whole and ensuring that you can show up better for everyone.

2 Optional Extra Tips To Consider for Single Parent Teacher Life

These two single parent tips don’t apply to everyone, but may be useful to you 🙂

1. Consider which ‘title’ you will use

This is only something that will impact you if you’re a woman teacher, as men are almost always ‘Mr!’ I was a young single parent with a daughter who attended the same school I worked for. So, all my students knew that I had a child, because my child was a student at our school.

I told older over 200+ older kids, and I wanted to avoid too many questions about why I was unmarried with a school-age child. So, as a French teacher, I chose to go by Mme instead of Mlle (the unmarried title.) Maybe they never would have asked, but it felt easier to just go with Mme. You may choose to go by Ms instead of Mrs or Miss if it makes you more comfortable.

2. Start a side hustle

For extra money, or even for a break from thinking about everything teaching and parenting, there are various side hustles to teaching. I know that this can also be easier said than done, as most teachers (especially ones who are also single parents) are going to be stretched pretty thin for time. But, side hustles that can generate a passive income are especially great for single parents because they can bring in another income without you lifting a finger. Although, a passive income can take an investment of time and/or money to get started, but after that – you have an extra stream of income trickling in.

However, one of the best things I did – even when I was teaching as a single parent- was do some work on the side. I earned extra money, and eventually, I turned it into my alternate career. I did tutoring, and also took up freelance writing and social media management. They earned me a bit of extra cash, and made me feel fulfilled in a different area besides supporting others (my kids and students.

Is Teaching a Good Job for Single Parents?

Being a teacher is a challenging job for single parents, but there are a few perks to it too. Overall, teaching has pros and cons. Here’s what you need to know about how they pertain to being a single parent:

Pros of teaching as a career for single parents

Downsides to teaching as a career for single parents

• Some of the after-hours requirements of teachers, such as parent-teacher interviews, school concerts and events, etc
• Having extra work to do on the evenings and weekends (when what you really need is a break)
• Having way too many young people depending on your (students and your children) can be an emotionally taxing responsibility
• The only times you can take a family vacation is during the school breaks, which are the most expensive times to travel

The verdict: Ultimately, teaching is a decent job for single parents in terms of salary and benefits, but it is very demanding job. One of the best perks of teaching as a parent is having the same breaks from work as your kids do from school. You can find put them into camps sometimes to get a break (I certainly did) but you aren’t scrambling to find daycare during school breaks as many other parents are.

Feeling like teaching in front of a classroom may not be for you? See this list of education-related jobs that are non-teaching!

Final Thoughts on Being a Single Parent Teacher

Being a single parent teacher is probably one of the hardest jobs in the world, but I hope that this article has given you tips on how to navigate it. Being a single parent and a teacher is a unique combination of responsibilities, because you’re solely responsible for the education and wellbeing of minors – those in your class at school, as well as those at home – without much help from another adult.

With teacher burnout on the rise, it’s important to look after yourself physically and mentally, and make sure that you aren’t always pushing yourself. Whatever you do – never regret anything you need to do to prioritize your mental health and wellbeing. You’re replaceable at work, but you’re not to your children at home and they (and you) always need to come first.

Whether you’re single and pregnant with your first child, or are already working as a teacher and a single parent, you have a challenging but also rewarding job. I hope that this blog post as served as a support, and to help you know that you’re not alone.