Do Teachers Have Favourites?

Are you a parent (or adult member of the public) who is curious about whether teachers have favourites among their students? If so, you’re in the right place.

Truthfully, the short answer is no – teachers don’t go to the trouble of having ‘favourite’ students. I have over 10 years of experience as a public school teacher. I can tell you from experience, that who our favourite student would be if we had to pick one wouldn’t be something that we’d spend time reflecting on.

It would be unprofessional and unacceptable for a teacher to:

• ever say that any student is their ‘favourite’
• display any obvious acts of favouritism for some students over others 

I never really thought about who my ‘favourite’ student was- I wouldn’t care to pick one. I also ever witnessed my colleagues sharing who their favourite students were, or who the ‘best’ kids are.

We’re there to teach an entire class of kids, and part of what makes it fun and interesting is the diversity of personalities, strengths, weaknesses and backgrounds in the class.

That being said – while we don’t have favourite students – there are some students who are easier or harder to work with than others. We know which students we can trust, and which ones will likely make our jobs harder.

So, let’s dig deeper into this complicated question as to whether teachers have favourites or not. In this article, you’ll hear about:

• what teachers having favourites really means
• what’s ok, and what’s not ok with regards to ‘favourites’ in the classroom

So, let’s jump in!

Teacher Favourites – What’s Ok, and Not OK

We like to say that all students are treated the same, but that isn’t really true. There are many situations where teachers need to treat students slightly differently, because of where they’re at. Here are a few examples of what would be appropriate (“ok”) and not appropriate (“not ok”) with regards to treating students differently

Do Teachers Have Favourites?

I cannot speak for all teachers as to whether they have any favourite students, but as someone who worked in the education system (and still has many close friends who are still teachers,) I know that more than often, we simply just want to do our jobs.

We don’t think about who our ‘favourite’ students are, its just not something that would cross our mind or occur to us.

Some of the things we may think about instead are:

• which students we trust (when it comes to delegating tasks, or getting to the bottom of what may have happened leading up to an incident)
• who might struggle with a particular activity
• who should sit together and who shouldn’t
• which student(s) have demonstrated that they deserve a particular award that we need to assign someone to, for a school assembly, nomination for a scholarship or something else

All of the above, as well as many other factors influence how we plan our days; lessons and activities.

While some students are easier to work with than others – it doesn’t mean that they’re our “favourite,” it simply means that they’re performing at a different level. And all students are different.

At the end of the day, we want our students to be intrinsically motivated, and we try to build that as much as we can in the classroom.

Her are a few things to keep in mind about teachers, which would be helpful for all parents to know:

1. Teachers don’t want to give poor grades

Students receive different grades from each other, and let me tell you – it’s no more fun for us to hand out crappy grades than it is for the student and their family to receive them.

Teachers want their students to pass and do well. Not just for the benefit of the student, but for our own peace of mind too.

It is extra work for us when we have to give a failing grade; we need to do quite a bit to demonstrate that we landed on this grade only after many efforts to help the student in any way we can.

If we did not put in 110% to help this student, then we face the blame for their failure (from the parents, admin or both.)

If a teacher is giving your child a less than desirable grade; I believe its not a decision that they make likely. I recommend talking to your child’s teacher to get to the bottom of what lead to the poor grade, so you can help your child improve.

2. Teacher don’t ‘dislike’ their students

I don’t think I ever heard a teacher say that they didn’t like one of their students. I heard about challenges with certain students, sure. But not that they actively disliked them.

Almost every teacher I met wanted nothing but to help the students, and for the classroom to be a safe and peaceful learning environment for all.

Having said that, even if a teacher does have personal reasons for not liking one of their students, they should never show that in their interactions, because their job is to try to help everyone, regardless of their personal beliefs.

3. We don’t want to pick on kids

It can be hard to receive a phone call from your child’s teacher, informing you that your child is struggling in the classroom. Your child may even come home and say that the teacher is ‘picking’ on them; focusing on their negative behaviour more than other kids.

Let me tell you – we didn’t go to university to become teachers, because we wanted to pick on kids. I can’t think of a single teacher I’ve ever met in my career that would do that.

If a teacher is taking the time out of their busy day to call a parent about their child’s behaviour, then its not something they’re doing out of enjoyment.

Teachers are using their lunch breaks or break time to call parents, and they’re doing it for no other reason than to help the student improve and get the parent on board with helping them.

Pro Tip: If your child’s teacher calls you to discuss their behaviour, thank them for their time and ask how you can help.

4. Teachers don’t pick favourites

That is my honest opinion – teachers don’t bother to pick ‘favourite’ students – why would they? It’s not a useful way to spend our time.

Teachers normally enjoy working with the vast majority of their students. They do however:

• find some students easier to work with than others (usually the ones that have some interest in being there and want to learn)
• come across students that they don’t enjoy working with; normally this is only students who have extreme behaviour problems, aggression or violence that we have to manage without any help, or support. In this case, it’s not that they don’t like the student personally – but they don’t like that they don’t have adequate support in helping the student manage it, or how it impacts their ability to do their job

You see, we aren’t at school to judge kids or pick favourites among them. We simply want to teach the classroom as a whole, and to be able to get through learning activities, lessons and games without too much hassle.

So while I don’t believe teachers pick favourite students, I do believe that there are students who can make our jobs harder or easier.

During my years as a teacher, I thought more about if I was enjoying my job as a whole, rather than about specific students and what my personal opinions of them were.

It’s just natural- and goes without saying – that there are some students who are easier to teach, easier to trust, or we have a better rapport with them for one reason or another.

However, that can be said for almost any professional who works with the public.

Have you ever asked a doctor, dentist, or therapist if they have any favourite clients that they enjoy working with more than others?

Chances are, they may say that they enjoy some more than others, but their jobs are to provide the same opportunity and level of care to everyone.

I want to stress that if we’re doing our jobs properly, then every student feels welcome and comfortable in our class.

Who our ‘favourites’ are, (or if we even have favourites at all) shouldn’t be something that the teacher focuses on, or the students think about. It shouldn’t be something that comes up in conversation at all.

The classroom shouldn’t have an environment where the students feel that some are more valued than others, and teachers should be professional enough to ensure that any personal bias or feelings they have, are put aside so that they can do their jobs.

That is what we expect from any professional serving the public, including doctors, firefighters, and therapists.

Do Teachers Dislike Teaching Students Who Have Behaviour Difficulties or Other Special Needs?

Absolutely not- in fact, sometimes students who struggle (behaviorally or academically) give us an opportunity to grow as educators.

Most teachers enjoy fostering growth mindset in the classroom. We don’t judge the students based on where they are; but on how far they come. We don’t expect perfection, we only expect improvement from where they started.

Special education was not my area of expertise however, I’ve heard from my special education colleagues how wonderful it is when they can make a difference in their students’ lives and help them reach milestones.

The students who are the ‘tougher nuts to crack’ can be more challenging to work with, but it is truly really rewarding once you see that you’ve made a difference in their lives, and watch their improvement as a result.

Being able to be apart of this is one of the biggest pros to being a teacher, and part of what makes teaching a worthwhile career for many.

The Hardest Students to Work With

The hardest students to work with are the ones that are showing blatant disrespect towards their teacher, as well as any kind of aggression, violence or teacher bullying.

These issues are becoming more common and are very challenging to handle as an educator.

Kids are young, and not perfect, and part of our job is to inspire and bring out the best in them. We don’t expect perfection; only a overall willingness to try, and some improvement between Septmeber and June.

We do however, want some basic respect, and to be able to get through the day without violence, or incidents that make us or the other students feel unsafe.

What makes our job very hard is when we face issues like swearing at the teacher, any aggressive behaviour or bullying towards the teacher, or any kind of violence in the classroom.

This isn’t to say that students with extreme behavioural difficulties aren’t our ‘favourites’.

It’s just that they the challenges they bring to the room are hard to work with; mostly due to minimal support from admin and parents.

The stress of dealing with extreme behavioural issues is a leading cause of teacher burnout.

As teachers, we try (sometimes with very limited resources) to give each kid the time, attention and accommodations that they require. Any of our personal thoughts or biases are not relevant and do not come into conjunction with how we do our job. We are professionals who are trained to execute inclusion, equity and belonging in our classrooms.

So, Do Teachers Have Favourites?

If you’ve gotten this far, then I hope you’ve had a chance to absorb what it means to be in a teacher’s perspective. We aren’t there to rank our kids from best to worst, and very few of us (if any) do.

At the end of the day, most teachers are there to teach a classroom full of different personalities, and we don’t expect kids to be robots. We like the diversity, their differences and what makes them unique.

Teachers are professionals who (should be) open-minded towards all their students.

While they may have some they find easier to teach and get along with, they should never show acts of blatant favouring (such as the examples I provided above on the ‘not ok’ list) of some students.

Teachers are trained professionals, and professionals are expected to:

• treat every one of their patients, clients or students equally and with respect
• do their part to ensure everyone feels welcome around them
• not let their own personal preferences, beliefs, feelings or biases get in the way of conducting themselves professionally at all times

Refer back to the chart of ‘ok’ and ‘not ok’ behaviour. As long as the teacher isn’t exhibiting any of the not ok behaviours towards your child, then I think they are behaving professionally and doing their best to treat their students fairly.

Final Thoughts on Teachers Having Favourites

This article is different from the ones I usually write, as its almost purely an opinion peace.

My personal opinion is that teachers don’t have favourites, because it typically doesn’t occur to us to pick a favourite, nor do we even talk about that topic amongst us. We have no interest in ranking the kids, or picking favourites. It would strike me as immature and strange (as well as unprofessional) if I heard teachers who were doing so.

We only care about being able to do our jobs effectively, and safely. We enjoy the diversity among our students, and how they all bring different strengths to the classroom.